


Complicated

by deadpoetisa



Category: The Goldfinch (2019), The Goldfinch - Donna Tartt
Genre: Angst and Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts, M/M, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, i'm gonna solve their issues, i'm not doing the internalized homophobia causa i don't wanna, kotku doesn't deserve hate!!!, lots of angry confusion, theo realizing he's just jealous
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:28:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22014136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadpoetisa/pseuds/deadpoetisa
Summary: Boris brings Kotku along again and Theo doeesn't undestand why he feels so angry.A Las Vegas fix-it because the boys and Kotku deserve better.
Relationships: Boris Pavlikovsky/Kotku, Theodore Decker/Boris Pavlikovsky
Comments: 5
Kudos: 44





	Complicated

**Author's Note:**

> hi! these started of an idea that kotku and theo get locked in a room together and i decided to solve that whole hating kotku situation. this is my first fic so sorry if it sucks.

It was supposed to be another night of me and Boris alone watching a movie and doing whatever, but of course Kotku had to come with him. I barely saw him since they started dating and when we had some time where was only the two of us he wouldn’t stop talking about her, about how smart she was (even though they met in a make-up class Boris only took because he was foreigner), how skinny she was and what a “great taste in music” she had, and now she was coming to my house with him. 

It was not the first time she came with him but I doubted it would be any better then that disaster of night where I had to ignore they making out in the couch until she had to leave and I had to pretend to Boris that I didn’t hate his messy excuse of girlfriend. That had been annoying enough but here she was again, siting in my living room passing a blunt to Boris who couldn’t be more oblivious to my annoyance. 

Boris took the blunt from her and whispered something in her ear before taking a drag and as she laughed I started to think again trying to find out what exactly was so great about her. Sure, she was pretty, even kind of hot, but after hearing what other people said about her and even Boris saying he suspected she was cheating on him I just couldn’t understand why her when almost every other girl in our year liked Boris. But even so, I couldn’t see him with someone like Saffi Caspersen either, and there was the problem. It had been me and Boris together for so long that it was hard for me too see us apart for a reason I couldn’t quite place. Sure, it was normal for us to get girlfriends but the more I thought I was just jealous because he had one, the more I realized that I wasn’t interested in any girl and that I just missed Boris more and more, but that was a dangerous thought I pushed away quickly. At the same time Boris, realizing I was quite there, called me out offering me the blunt. 

“No thanks, I'm good” I said, turning back to the tv and grabbing my beer when I saw Kotku looking at me from her place at Boris side. 

“Suit yourself, Potter” Boris said before going back to whispering to her in a way that caused me to ache for a reason I couldn’t place. I quickly drank the rest of my beer and got up from my place on the floor to get another from the fridge. I thought that the more wasted I got, the better I would deal with the situation but when I got back to the living room and saw Kotku sitting on Boris lap, him half laying on the couch as she kissed his neck the ache came back too strongly and I barely registered my beer dropping as I turned around and ran to my room. 

Closing the door behind me, I tried to catch my breath and think of why that had affected me like it did. It wasn’t the first time I saw them making out on my couch, so why was I like this? Why was I so affected about everything Boris and Kotku did? Why did I hate her so much and why was I so dismissive with Boris when he talked about her? Why did I get so angry all the time Boris wasn’t with me? 

While I tried to get a hold of my thoughts there was a knock on the door. “What?!” I shouted, sitting in the bed with my face in my hands. Very slowly, the door was opened. “Potter? What’s wrong?” I heard Boris enter the room and walk to me. 

“You scared Kotku, you feeling sick?” he said sitting on the bed next to me. “Kotku said you might be feeling sick from leftovers we ate earlier” he kept going like I gave a fuck about what she said and I could feel myself getting angry and Boris was still saying something about me “not eating enough like Kotku but she could could hold her liquor better” and I was so tired of hearing about her that I snapped. It all went too fast, one minute was burring my face in my hands trying to ignore Boris and the other I lifted my face, grabbed his face and told him “Shut up about Kotku” before smashing my lips on his. 

It lasted a second. A quick, angry, kiss before I realized what I was doing and pushed him away. Boris, nearly falling off the bed, looked at me startled. “Potter...” he started, his look had softned, but I was far too sober to hear anything he had to say about it. 

“Get out.” I said going back on the bed. He opened his mouth to say something again while trying to approach me but I cut him fast. “I said get out.” 

“Potter, wait-” he tried again as I got up pulled him by the arm. 

“Get Out!” I shouted pushing him out of the room “Both of you.” I ignored the hurt look on his face and slammed the door shut. I heard him walking down the stairs, saying something to Kotku and them the front door opening and closing. 

I slowly went to my bed and picked the package of the painting behind it. Laying back on the bed, I hugged it to my chest trying to understand what had happened. I still didn’t understand or didn’t want to understand why I was so angry at Boris and Kotku but now the aching on my chest was different. It hurt more, the kiss had felt much more than those clumsy nights Boris and I ‘helped each other’. And with the growing ache I realized that I didn’t felt angry about Boris being with Kotku, I was angry about him not being with me. I wanted Boris for myself in more ways than I had. 

While I pondered the thought I fell asleep hugging the package and fearing the next day where I would have to face him again.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah, title is avril lavigne.  
> thanks for reading, pls commet letting me know what you think??  
> find me on tumblr at deadpoetisa.tumblr.com and twitter at @catherinxzz


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